SINGAPORE: A woman recently shared her Chinese New Year experience online, saying she was disappointed to learn that her toxic cousins had not changed their lifestyle all these years.
“Every year I dread CNY because of toxic cousins. I thought now we’re all much older, everyone will be more sensible and have a higher EQ,” a woman wrote on r/askSingapore on Saturday (Feb 10).
She also revealed that she was made fun of because of her relationship, even though her cousins were not married.
Wanting to know if anyone else felt the same way about their family reunions, she asked her fellow Singaporeans, “Has anyone had a similar experience? Share your CNY stories here!”
“Culture in SG is kiasu (afraid to LOSE)”
The post seems to have struck a chord with many Singaporean Redditors as they sympathized with the woman and shared their own harrowing experiences in the comments section.
One Redditor shared, “Me!! My aunt despised me for the color of my hair, criticized me for drinking alcoholic cider, called me fat. Another aunt asks why I don’t have a boyfriend when I’m 25 this year and I’m not interested in him at this stage.
Also many comparisons with other cousins»
Another Reddit user also said that even though she recently got married, she was met with questions like, “When are you going to have kids?”
She added: “Also, I assumed it was well known that couples in the first year of marriage get a free ticket to give angbao, but my aunt insisted that ‘one should give more the first year.’ HAH. No”
One Redditor also asked why “toxic relatives are so common in Singapore”, to which another responded:
“Because the culture in SG is kiasu (fear of LOSING). So, comparison is the 1st order of conversation. Compare. Lose. Glorious or bitter. This is SG.
So the next question is why are Singaporeans (or most Asians) so focused on not losing?
Because we are still stuck in the understanding of pre-developed economics, that self-worth is measured in dollars and that human life has no meaning outside of that.
We became richer by dollars. But still poor at heart.”
Terrible CNY family reunion
Rather than looking forward to it, it seems some Singaporeans weren’t too keen on celebrating Chinese New Year this year, as it meant attending family celebrations they dreaded.
One Singaporean even expressed his reluctance to meet his “judgmental and critical” family members this time of year on social media, asking others online how to celebrate and avoid their prying questions.